I don't know what makes people say things like that; "It will get easier with time." You know what? It doesn't. It's been over three years since I left my kids in Kuwait and I miss them every single day and the ache of not being able to touch, hold, see, or speak to them is like a gaping hole in my heart that isn't going to heal. There are days when I can talk about them and smile and laugh at the memories of fun times we had or silly things that we did together, but underneath that is always the raw, empty hurt.
I have tried to reach out to my oldest three with varying degrees of success. The younger of the three wants nothing to do with me. My eldest sent me an email telling me that she tried but just wasn't ready. And the middle one, my eldest son - my baby who used to grab my feet and kiss them because he loved me so dearly - he's suddenly stopped communicating with me on Facebook. Not that it was anything other than sporadic in the first place, but it was something.*heavy hearted sigh*
I know that I have been given blessings beyond measure in my son, Cernan, and his father, both of whom I love dearly. Still ... when is it finally going to be true? When is it going to be easier?
I cannot imagine how hard it was for you to leave... Just to save yourself so that you may still be there for the future of your children... Easier? Probably never... I (we) can hope and pray that someday your children will understand and come back to the mother that loves them so much and meet one of the most wonderful people that I know! (((HUGS)))
ReplyDeleteThank you, Tina. You're an amazing woman and I appreciate your caring and support. ((((hugs back at 'cha))))
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